Canadians were rocked with yet another political scandal over the weekend when the Globe and Mail finally released a story they’d been sitting on for the better part of a month: Conservative Party of Canada Leader Andrew Scheer was never a licensed insurance broker.
Shockingly, many Canadians couldn’t even manage to be outraged, opting instead for mildly perturbed.
“Gah,” noted Edmontonian Dani Paradis, “even Scheer’s scandals are boring”.
Conservative Party of Canada staff and apologists took to social media to decry the news as “fake” and “lies” while Andrew Scheer admitted that though he had passed all the exams, he left the industry before processing of his license was complete.
According to the licensing requirements for brokers in Saskatchewan, the final step in acquiring such a license is filling out an application form. No word yet as to which part of the form Scheer was having trouble with.
“I can’t believe people are making a big deal about this,” one Canadian said about Scheer falsifying his credentials. “No one cares if he can sell insurance!”
Licensed insurance brokers, who probably didn’t support Scheer in the first place, responded with contempt that the potential Prime Minister would suggest he was qualified to do their job, let alone hold the highest role in the country.
Adding salt to the gaping wound, the Liberals requested an inquiry into whether Scheer broke the law by claiming he was, in fact, a licensed insurance broker in the province of Saskatchewan when, in fact, he never was.
Unlike claiming to be the best choice for Prime Minister, claiming to be someone who has the appropriate credentials to sell insurance in Saskatchewan may actually be against the law.
American news personalities who thought they might get another break from their own circus of pain were unable to make it through Canadian election updates without laughing hysterically.
This post is satirical.
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